Empowering Service Providers: Strategies for Cultivating Community and Achieving Success with Emily Sereno

S3 Ep17 Episode Shownotes:

“What is happening is happening to you, but it doesn't define who you are, it doesn't change who you are. It doesn't make you any less credible in your business because you want to talk about it. It doesn't make you lazy because you have to go down to the status quo in your business for a little while while you focus on helping yourself.” —Emily Sereno

Providing exceptional service is the cornerstone of any thriving business. But how do you cultivate a service-driven venture that not only fulfills your clients but also ignites your own passion? In this episode, we uncover the secrets to building a resilient and purpose-driven service-based business.

Emily Sereno is the founder of The ServicePreneur Network, a community dedicated to empowering entrepreneurs who offer their expertise as a service. With over 12 years of corporate marketing experience, Emily has harnessed her passion for helping others achieve their business goals.

Tune in as Heather and Emily dive into the resilience required to build a thriving service-based business, navigating personal challenges like fertility struggles, the importance of community and authenticity in entrepreneurship, Emily's podcast strategy and vision for empowering early-stage service-based entrepreneurs, and more. 

Connect with Heather: 

Website

Facebook 

Instagram

LinkedIn

Episode Highlights:

01:58 Meet Emily

07:32 Challenges and Rewards of Entrepreneurship

11:32 Emily’s Podcast and Business Vision 

23:38 Personal and Professional Growth

33:50 The Importance of Support and Connection 

43:22 Does Your Business Reflect Your Values   

47:29 Show Up

Connect with Emily: 

Emily Sereno, the founder of The Servicepreneur Network, is a corporate marketing executive turned entrepreneur, business and branding consultant, fractional CMO, and podcast host.

She’s dedicated her career to helping executives find their voice, positioning them as credible experts in their field, while building brand and marketing strategies for Fortune 500 companies, startups, and more.

After more than 12 years, Emily is bringing her signature framework to service-based business owners to help them navigate and overcome the challenges they face promoting their business while connecting them with the resources, support, and platform to connect with their ideal clients.

Website

Transcript

Heather Nelson: Hello everyone. Welcome to this week's Life Conversations With a Twist. I am very honored to have Emily on the podcast. Let me just put some context to this. I listen to Keisha, which I probably listen to like five podcasts. She's one of them. She's one of my weekly ones that I listen to. And you actually went through one of her courses, and you were on her podcast. I remember listening to your episode like, this is so cool. I just loved your conversation and what you're doing in your business, and then we're in this group podcast thing. You and I were connecting, and I didn't put it all together. I'm just excited to have you here. I feel like you're this famous person that's been on the show.

Emily Sereno: Heather, thank you so much for having me. I am definitely not that cool, so I appreciate it. But I'm just a normal person, just like you.

Heather Nelson: I love that, but I just remember listening to it. I was like, oh, this is so cool. I just love your story. And she's got an interview with Keisha. I would just even love to be in a conversation with her.

Emily Sereno: She is just such a joy, and the energy that she brings to a room. Like a lot of the story that I hope to share with you today kind of originates from my experience working with her and learning from her, and kind of looking at this year a little bit differently. So I'm excited to chat with you.

Heather Nelson: I love it. Okay, so let's take you back to little Emily. So like tell us a little bit about more like day to day. Where do you live, family life? What does your world look like right now?

Emily Sereno: Yeah. So I am originally from upstate New York, and I, earlier this year, moved from New York to Florida for my husband's job. We were there for about seven months, and then we came back to New York. So I'm currently live in the capital, Albany, New York region, and it's me, my husband, and our little fur baby right now. So the three of us get to hang out and kind of build a new community here, which I turn 36 in a couple weeks. And let me tell you, building and making friends as an adult is super hard, so I am in the throes of like, Hey, who wants to be my friend? How do you beat people? And so kind of building my business, building my community here, and I'm also trying to build a family at the same time. So staying busy, that's for sure.

Heather Nelson: I love that there's a group here locally where I live where that's what she does. She brings women together, and she does different fun little events like Bunko and entrepreneur mixers, and things like that. She built this community for someone like you who might not have a lot of friends, not have a huge network, whether they've moved here or whatnot. I've been blessed because I'm still living in the same town I was born in, and so I literally know everybody so I don't know what that's like. But sometimes, you just gotta find those, find your people in your community. Because again, we're gonna talk through some of the things that you know, what you're working on, what you just started. And I think community is everything.

Emily Sereno: It's so true. And I have been really lucky where, in this area, there's a lot of networking, there's a lot of entrepreneurs that get together and do things. I like to tell people that. Well, I used to say that I'm in my do it scared season, but I think I'm in my just do it scared all the time. Because I am just realizing that in order to kind of put yourself out there and meet people, or do something, or see the result that you want, whatever that could be, you have to just do it scared. And there's never going to be this perfect time. So I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna go to that networking event by myself, and I'm gonna stick it out and meet people. And I've been pretty fortunate where I've had the chance to meet some incredible people. And I'm like, okay, gotta join a gym so I can maybe make some friends there, or meet people in the grocery store to be determined. Haven't tried that one yet. But all the things, I'm just like, you know what? Life is too short to take things too seriously, so I'm just gonna try it and hope for the best.

Heather Nelson: Okay, so you just started your own business. And before we started recording, you and I were kind of chatting about how this conversation was gonna go. And we're literally in the same boat. We both have a podcast, and we both started our own service based business within the last year. So talk a little bit about where this idea came from, maybe your career background, and how you got to where you are today.

Emily Sereno: So I am the founder of The Servicepreneur network, and I work with service based business owners. So entrepreneurs that have built an incredible business around their knowledge, their skill sets, their expertise. So unlike a product based business, you are selling a service where somebody is paying their time, or paying for your time, and what you can offer to them. And so I got the idea to really step out onto my own after spending like 12 years in corporate marketing. I joke and say that I got to the top of the corporate ladder. I looked around and I was like, this can't be it for me. And I always just felt drawn to having a bigger impact and being able to have my skill set go further. I would come home every day and kind of be frustrated with leadership or not being able to use my skill set to its fullest. And I think that you can only come home so many times from work. Ain't great until your husband is like, why don't you just start your own business already? And so he kind of really put the confidence in me and gave me the push that, yeah, it's time. We were still starting to build our family at the time, or try to, and I really was just like, if I'm going to do it, I have to take the risk now. And I'm so grateful that I did, Heather, because I wake up happier every day. I wake up and my feet hit the ground, and I think about the clients that I get to serve. I get to serve them in the fullest capacity that I can with my skill sets and really help them build successful businesses. 

So I basically took all of my years in corporate marketing and translated that into working one on one with servicepreneurs, which is a phrase that I coined for working with service based business owners to really help them fine tune to who they are? What do they do? And articulate that in a way that's going to help them get the right clients that they need to grow their business. But the thing that I'm even more excited about is I just launched an online community where I can bring early servicepreneurs. So the people who are just starting out on their entrepreneurial journey, and they're great at what they do, but they don't necessarily know how to build their brand or do marketing for themselves. And so a lot of times, what you see is there's these super expensive mastermind programs, or hiring an agency or a coach. And when you're just getting started, you don't have the money to do that and so I built this community for $67 a month where somebody can come in, and they can learn from me. They can learn from each other, they can get on podcasts, they can do brand collaborations, and really feel like they're putting the right foundations in place to grow their business. I just get to help even more people, which is what fills my cup up the most and keeps me excited. But also on my toes a little bit too, because every day is different.

Heather Nelson: Oh, my god, I can relate. I have so many thoughts, but I jotted down. I can totally relate. Let's finally go out on our own, because that's the same boat that I was in. I was just saying to someone the other day, because I'm in this boat of, if somebody has an idea that they're thinking about wanting to go out on their own and they kind of don't know what to do, but they're scared to leave their job, I'm literally, this is the best thing I've ever done in my life. I'm like, I have so much flexibility. I can take a day off if I need to. I can go pick my kids up from school. I get to hand pick my clients. It's one of those things that I would never go back to.

Emily Sereno: It's so true. Because I think one of the things that most entrepreneurs like about working for themselves is that flexibility and freedom, and you don't get that when you're constantly on Slack and having to make sure that you're checking in with the boss, or whatever it might be. And I agree. The fact that it can be a Tuesday afternoon and I can decide that I want to drive home to see my little nephews, spend time with them Halloween in the middle of the week and I don't have to stress about who I'm not talking to during the day. Or I can create my own schedule. It's a different beast, for sure. But if anybody is listening to this and has the itch to take that leap? I agree with you, do it.

Heather Nelson: I'm not gonna lie, it is hard. All the things like, what kind of business should you apply for your taxes, insurance, social media. I think that the hardest thing for me this last year was exactly what you said, which I cannot wait to have this conversation with you. I definitely wanna check out your network. I know what I'm good at, and I know what I'm seen for. But putting that into my brand, or what I want to sell has been the hardest thing. Over this last year, I've taken on clients that might not be a good fit for me, or something that I was passionate about, but I knew it was something that I was good at. I'm like, it wasn't something that was like the driving force of my business. And so this year has been very much all over the place of trying to identify what it is that I want to do.

Emily Sereno: It's such a fun part when you're getting started to kind of think about, what is my brand identity? Who do I want to be? And what are the services that I want to be offering? And then you think about, okay, all of these things to outsource, cost money, right? There are definitely aspects of it where you need to hire a lawyer or work with someone to build your client contracts to protect your business. You need somebody to help you with your finances. And what I have always found is marketing is the one that most people are like, I'm gonna keep that one. I can figure it out. Because when you're looking at money differently, you have to be strategic with how you're using it. I kind of just got to this point where I got fed up with people being raised your prices and only thinking about high value clients, and then you've got to just equate somebody who can spend a lot of money. Let's be honest here, that's all that that means. And there's this entire group of people who are like, well, I need and deserve the same access to information, guidance and support, but I can't drop thousands of dollars on marketing. 

And so kind of to what you shared, the vision for me creating this community was for me to create something where people could feel heard, understood, supported, and basically get the blueprint of like, this is your business model. We only talk about this business model. Every piece of advice you're going to get for myself and other members is going to be valuable for your business. It takes that pressure off without having this anxiety or pit in your stomach of swiping your credit card for money that you don't necessarily want to spend. And here it's a lower price point to make it affordable so that you get access to expert guidance just like everybody else should. That's kind of my mission and driving force behind what I've kind of built so far, and I'm trying to grow now.

Heather Nelson: I love that. I definitely need to check it out. I think it's so funny because so many people that I've been meeting, they're all like consultants or coaches. I feel like my life is in this bubble right now. And I feel like a lot of us are struggling with it, you were saying people are paying us for our time. We set $1 per hour. But then, it's one of those things that it's not like, okay, you're paying me to do a website. I'm going to do a website, I'm going to hand it to you, and it's done. But like a lot of consultants, there's not really a physical thing that you're giving them. It's hard to justify to them. They could come back and be like, I didn't get what you proposed. But it's so hard to justify that, because it's a weird world. That is probably one of the things I've struggled with this year.

Emily Sereno: I have been in many, and I see a lot of the same themes where people that are charging thousands of dollars are offering the same advice that I would give somebody for a much lower price. Or maybe not the right advice for their business, or they're not even getting exposure because they're one of many in a mastermind or a group program. Or they're paying into it, maybe a done for you service that you buy into, and it doesn't necessarily translate to the goals that you have. And so to have something that's still a community oriented network, but with that one on one access through calls, free coaching with me, and different things that I offer. My whole thing was, I just want people to feel seen, heard, understood and supported. And if you can get that through calls with me where I'm going to teach you something, and then you're going to go and implement it in your business, and then you're gonna come to my office hours next week and tell me the progress you've made, and share your screen, and ideally launch things faster. The online space is really confusing and overwhelming at times, especially when you're just getting started. So to be able to kind of have that confidence and clarity is really important when you're finding the thing that's the right fit for you.

Heather Nelson: What is your membership like just for anybody out there that might be interested in being a part of it?

Emily Sereno: It's kind of two sides to it. So one is the Evergreen where information is always there and available to you. So you come in, there's a podcast corner where you can go in and talk about your podcast. You can find guests on your podcast. You can pitch to be on other people's shows. There's a services section so you can actually sell and promote your services, get referrals for services that you need in your business as well. There's a resource area. I'm constantly throwing templates, resources, checklists and downloads, and all of these written tutorials for the person who I prefer to read information, and then that's the merit with self paced tutorials. So say that you're coming in and you're like, I need to know if this is what I am missing in my marketing strategy. There's a DIY strategy audit to walk you through the things to be like, nope, you're missing this, this, this. These are the foundations that you need from a marketing standpoint, along with video tutorials on a whole bunch of things marketing and business wise too. So those are things that are there all the time. And then every month, we do live training and workshops. So we'll pick a topic, and people can come in. They're going to learn from me where I'm walking you through the steps. In the past, we've done things like the marketing foundations workshop. We've talked about, how do you actually build your content strategy? Because most people know, I know I need to be posting reels, or I need to be posting carousels. People know that. They want to know, well, what should I be putting in that content to make it convert for my clients? So we had an entire training on that. 

We did a lead magnet training to create freebies in your business to boost those email lists. So we have these live training sessions that then immediately get paired with office hours where you can come in and say, hey, I got stuck here. I have questions here. Or could you give me feedback on this live on the call? So I'm there interacting with members. And then there's a live chat area too. So in between all of that, you can actually come in and say, hey, I'm working on this. A perfect example. I have a brand personality quiz that I created, and I jumped into the network. I was like, hey, will somebody test this to make sure that my automations were set up properly? I had a couple people do it. I saw their emails come in. I said, perfect. This is working how I need it to. Because otherwise, it's just me home alone working by myself, and then I pushed it live. And now, I've got a way for me to attract potential people into the membership, get some in real time support from me and their members too. So it's kind of a one stop shop to help you learn, hold you accountable, get the support you need. But all of it is centered around taking action and getting the blueprint to kind of put the right marketing strategies in place for your service based business.

Heather Nelson: I love it. I definitely want to check it out, for sure. What was the mind child behind the podcast? Who are your guests? And what can people learn if they were to listen in on you?

Emily Sereno: This is a little bit of a backstory before I answer your question. So I had a completely different podcast last year. I was interested in podcasting, and it was right about the time when I decided to kind of go off on my own. I had no idea what I was doing, and I wanted to just have conversations about pivotal moments that people were experiencing because I was going through this pivotal moment of leaving corporate and starting my business. And then when I joined Keisha's Mastermind in February of this year, one of the first conversations was, you got to change your podcast. And she was absolutely right. For somebody who might not be familiar, her mastermind was, how do you leverage your podcast as a driver in your business? And so as I was kind of in the throes of really fine tuning, who I wanted to be working with from a client standpoint to create this network concept in my business. Because up until that point, I was only doing one on one marketing consulting and coaching with clients. We were trying to be thinking about the podcast as an entry point on how I could use that to not only build my brand credibility. Because I wanted people to know, she knows what she's talking about from a marketing standpoint. And to create a wider funnel for people to get introduced to me, to learn about all the offers that I have, and then ideally funnel them into working with me. And so The Servicepreneur Podcast, which is the name of my new podcast, was a way for me to say my business is the Servicepreneur network. I want to have some consistency. I was also in the process. I still am, fingers crossed of trademarking Servicepreneur. 

And so for me, it was a natural fit to introduce this podcast where I could really lean into helping that early entrepreneur who's in that zero to five years of business to give them free advice. And basically, the premise of my podcast is you can come in, listen to an episode, get really tactical advice, turn around, implement it in your business and start seeing results. And so I like to share a lot about marketing, branding and content. I love bringing people on to share their zone of genius, all under the guise of, if you have a service based business, whether it's marketing, personal development operations, business strategy, finance legal all the things, the goal is you could come in and get what you need and get out. Because time is money. We don't have enough time, and we all need more money. So the goal is to teach you, and ideally get great information that you can immediately use in your business.

Heather Nelson: The zone of genius. Are you reading Take The Leap?

Emily Sereno: No, what is that?

Heather Nelson: I think it's called Take The Leap.

Emily Sereno: A book it is.

Heather Nelson: He talks about the zone of genius as the top of the zone. But there's three other zones before. We all kind of live in a zone, but you need to get to the zone of genius to be happy, flourish and do this thing. I'm only two chapters in, but I'll send you the link.

Emily Sereno: Oh, yeah, I love that.

Heather Nelson: It's actually been really cool to read. It was just funny because I literally just read that zone of genius yesterday.

Emily Sereno: Oh, my gosh, that's so funny. I have not, but I am in need of a new book. That sounds great.

Heather Nelson: I'll send it to you, for sure. I love what you're doing. I think it's so needed. I am in that weird stage too. Keisha would just eat me alive because my business has absolutely nothing to do with my podcast. But my podcast started first. My podcast is what I love. I've always wanted to have this space for women to come and share their story to be inspired, and empower other women to either share their story, or know that they're not in it alone. We're gonna get into you next, your little twist in your journey. But has nothing to do with my business, whatsoever.

Emily Sereno: You know what? I don't think it always has to be right. I had even thought that I'd love to resurrect my old podcast and bring it back just from a pure fulfillment and passion perspective. And who knows? You and I are having this conversation, and I'm sitting here like you need to be on my podcast and introduce you to my community because there's so much value that you could provide. I love talking about podcasting, and I am actually working with a couple of clients to launch podcasts right now, which is really fun for me. Being a year into this, and this little idea that I had has now turned into a money maker for me. But I do think that there doesn't have to be a strict box of what your podcast can be if you're enjoying it. Who knows where it could lead down the road so I wouldn't beat yourself up.

Heather Nelson: I'm not. When I talk to people about both, you automatically light up when you talk about your podcast. That to you is something that is so important in your life. And not that my business is not, but my business is paying the bills. The podcast is not, but the podcast is my passion. So it's like, how do I change that perspective and make the podcast actually make me money? We'll get there someday.

Emily Sereno: I've got a lot of ideas for you, and I can never turn my brain off, so we can talk.

Heather Nelson: And that's how I am. I'm like, I meet with someone and they're like, I had this idea to do this business. And I'm like, here's a marketing plan.

Emily Sereno: Are you a projector? Have you done your human design?

Heather Nelson: I am a manifesting generator. So similar.

Emily Sereno: I am a projector where all I want to do is give people advice and ideas that I always like, Emily, take a breath. Make sure that they want to receive all the ideas. First off, I just can't help it. I'm like a little puppy dog who just wants to jump on you. I feel like that's how I get in business with ideas and just wanting to see other people just kill it in their business, and just give them all the things that they could ever think about to help them get there.

Heather Nelson: I'm so that way, but I want to be the idea generator. I don't want to be the doer. I just want to tell you what I think you should do, and then I want you to go do it. Then you give me the money. I just did this exercise with a friend the other day, but I'm totally ,do you do enneagram? Do you believe in enneagram?

Emily Sereno: I have done it. I am a 1 Wing 2, which basically means that I don't know enough about it. I am stubborn, but I am also very compassionate. I want to help other people. Everything needs to follow the rules and do things fairly, I think, is the description of it. I might have got that wrong. Oh, she got that completely wrong. I think that's what I'm telling myself, but that's what I'm sticking with.

Heather Nelson: I can never remember what it is, but I think it is. Yes, I'm an achiever, which totally makes sense. I'm constantly like, hey, what can I do? I have two businesses. I'm kind of crazy, right? But I wing in helper, which is helping and wanting to help people through podcasting or whatever. And then my other wing is creativity, which is where I get creative ideas.

Emily Sereno: Cool. You're the criteria of all the good stuff.

Heather Nelson: One of my guests probably a couple weeks ago, she does what she does about business coaching through Enneagram. She teaches you about your Enneagram and how you can run a business or work with others through it. But I do want to learn human design, but that's my next thing.

Emily Sereno: I connect you with somebody there. Okay, sounds good.

Heather Nelson: So let's talk personally for a minute. And again, you can get as personal as you want. But one of the things that you talked about on Keisha's podcast was you were growing this business while you're trying to grow your family. Can you walk us through what that life has been like the past year?

Emily Sereno: Like I said, I just crossed over the year mark in my business. And so at the end of last year, I was like, 2024 is going to be my hustle season. It is going to be my year of execution. I had this massive plan of all the things I wanted to do, and I felt really great about it. I joined Keisha's mastermind in February, which put gasoline on the fire in terms of my excitement and all these big ideas that I had. And I was ready. And then life hit me in the face. And a couple months into the year, we found out that we were pregnant for the first time after a long time of trying, but were immediately met with complications. I was in the hospital for like two months every single Friday. We had just moved to Florida, and no doctor would see you there as a new patient. They just keep going to the emergency room, which is not where you want to be ever. Let alone every week. And so I would go and would never get any answers. They basically were just like, we need to keep waiting and come back. And the long story short, we ended up losing the pregnancy. I went from having this aggressive business mindset of what the year was going to look like for me, and everything that I was going to do. Basically, I ran into a wall, and everything came to a standstill because I was uncertain as to, well, what's going to happen? Is this going to turn into a regular pregnancy? Are we going to get good news? Are we going to get bad news? 

I didn't want to tell my family because this little thought in the back of my head was like, well, if this turns around, I could go home and do a really fun reveal the next time that we flew home. I had all of these moments of optimism in between a lot of negativity. And so I went from running really fast to just stopping, having to grieve and deal with the emotions and the loneliness of us being so far away from anyone in our family. And all of the things on top of like, I'm also a new entrepreneur, and I'm trying to figure out, how do I make money? But I didn't want to do anything. All I wanted to do was sit on my couch, cry and be sad. I had zero motivation. I didn't have any energy, which is like a recipe for disaster when you're trying to build a business. I went into this status quo mode where I was like, what are the things that I'm gonna have to do to keep my current clients happy and be okay with just status quo for a little while until I can get back to a place where life feels okay again.

Heather Nelson: And what is your like? Where are you at in your fertility journey now?

Emily Sereno: We had to have the procedure done. I had that done in July. And then at the end of August, we moved back to New York. And honestly, there's something to be said. I know we talked a little bit about having a community and people around you, knowing that I'm two hours away from my family now has completely helped me. Knowing that I've got my mom, even though I'm 36 soon, there's just something of having a family. So from a mindset perspective, I struggled for a very long time. It did not really turn a corner for me until I moved back. And I think it was partially like, let's get out of the place where we had a lot of negativity. The month before, I lost my fur baby who was my cat from my first job out of college. And so there was a lot of pain associated with where we were. I'm still grieving. There are days where I wake up and I'm like, man, this sucks. We're still going through the fertility journey, doing the testing and getting as much information as we can. And making adjustments to our lifestyles. Where I'm at now is at this place of finding myself again, which is so hard. Because when you're going through it, even if it's not something fertility related, right? Even if it's something like you're struggling with something in general in your life, there's a little bit of numbness and loss of identity that happens, and you kind of have to find yourself again. 

I had to simultaneously try to find myself as Emily, and then also find myself in my business. I've been having a lot of reflection time right now because I have had a hard year. It's been rough for me. But now, I'm settling into like, well, this is going to be my new normal for a little bit as we kind of take the next stage and what that will look like to be determined from a family standpoint. But having to find my identity and my business, and find that excitement like I'm very much at a place now months later that I'm like, okay, I have clarity in the business, and I'm leaning into the clarity in the business of who I want to serve. And is that a safety mechanism a little bit probably, but it's helping me to find that passion and that spark again, which will inevitably lead into me as a person. So I would say that if there's somebody who's listening to this who is going through something like a fertility battle, it never ends. I am very lucky that I now have great people to lean on and support me because I made the decision not to talk about it before, but grief still pops its head up so often. 

One of my best friends from high school got pregnant this year, and I live within distance of her to drive to her baby shower. Before I sent her a message, I was like, I can't do it. I said, I'd love to come see you, just the two of us, but I can't. I can't put myself in that situation just yet. I wasn't ready. I'm not really sure. I don't have anybody else in my world that is pregnant, but I think where I'm at is still grieving, healing, but finding something that has allowed me to kind of focus on the positive, and focus on forward motion. Progress has been so helpful, and the change of scenery hasn't helped or hurt either. I'm a mountain girl, and we are in the Adirondack Mountain region now, so that doesn't hurt either.

Heather Nelson: I don't know when you say New York, I think of downtown New York. That's all in my head.

Emily Sereno: We are upstate. Upstate New York is like farms, mountains. You got to drive a car if you want to go to Target.

Heather Nelson: One thing you mentioned earlier was that you felt like starting a business and becoming an entrepreneur and dealing with fertility issues. It's like you're on this deserted island all by yourself. So many people are in those buckets dealing with those things, but you do feel so alone. You're like, can I just have someone to talk to. That's what really sparked my podcast idea because I've had these conversations with women, and they all varied in different topics. They were always like, I felt like, so alone. Or I don't know anyone else, but I'm like, I know so and so who went through the same thing. Someone's been through the same exact thing. I want to just make these topics and conversations just available for people. And then also to not hide in it. Not hide in your journey, and not hide in the hard things. Because honestly, those hard things are what makes you blossom and grow, and what makes you explore other things. And so I want to leave that there for people to be like, I'm gonna be okay.

Emily Sereno: You were so right. Everyone knows societal pressure. Don't tell anybody that you're pregnant until the end of your first trimester because so many things can go wrong. If you were to ask me a year, two years, five years ago, are you going to tell anybody when you get pregnant? I'd be like, no, I'm going to wait until the first trimester is up. Then going through this experience where I'm like, absolutely not. If we find out we're pregnant in the future, I'm going to need that support system more than I ever did before. And it's something that was a lesson that I heard and learned the hard way of not talking about it, because you need to. And then when I started to talk about it, I told a bridesmaid in an Instagram DM, what happened? Because nobody tells you how to handle it. Does that sound like something that is so life changing to me, but I didn't know how to talk about it. I didn't know how to bring it up. I also felt this guilt of burdening someone and putting that weight or sadness on their shoulders. 

One of the things that I realized is that your family, your friends, the people that are closest to you can hold space for you. And they can be there for you just as much as they want to celebrate the ups, they can celebrate the downs too. And so regardless of the struggle that you're going through, you're 100% right that loneliness makes it 10 times worse. And if people are just willing to talk about it, it could help more people than you could ever know. I shared this with you before we got started. I'm a pretty private person. There is absolutely no way that I'm gonna share so much of my life. I still even struggle to show up on social media sometimes because I'm just like, what am I gonna talk about? Nobody cares what I'm doing in my day to day. And I remember when I went on Keisha's podcast and I talked about it, it was like my entire world opened up. It was an immediate inbox flood of people that were like, thank you so much for sharing your story. I had a message from someone that was like, this is me. You are me. We are the same. I'm struggling with this too. Thank you so much for being comfortable talking about it. And it was like a light bulb moment for me where I was like, okay, I helped one person. 

So as uncomfortable and scary as it was for me to go on and share, quite literally, the most personal part of my life with the world, it has done so much good. I think it helped me grieve, but it's also opened up so many doors to kind of go back to what you said about the podcast, and not having any relation to your business. I was like, what in the world is me talking about fertility challenges and pregnancy loss have anything to do with business? And then I sat with that for a second and I was like, it has everything to do with it. Because how I showed up in my business was radically different in the first six, seven, eight months of the year.I'm just now catching my stride, I think, at the end of the year. I found that through the line of, okay, me talking about the softer side, or the more emotional, vulnerable side of life. Because as business owners, life doesn't stop when we're working on our business and vice versa. And so it allowed me to kind of realize that you can bring your full self to your work. You can be vulnerable. You can share the hard things. 

And if anything, it's probably going to make you more relatable, more liked, more trusted. It opened so many doors for me in terms of meeting people like you that I never probably would have met otherwise. Or connections to people that are like, I want to work with somebody like you because I feel connected to you on a deeper level. So I do think that having conversations like this, and even with your podcast link, there is a through line to everything that we do, and I think that it just makes it less pressure. It feels like there's more pressure to have hard conversations. I'm back to the identity thing. I'm more true to myself now in sharing the hard things than I've ever been before. And weirdly grateful for it, not for the circumstance, but for the opportunity to use that as a way to use my voice, my platform and my way to connect with more people in a way that I think more of us need help with.

Heather Nelson: I totally agree with that. I have so many thoughts around everything that you just said.

Emily Sereno: I just get so excited.

Heather Nelson: It's good just being authentic. That's all you need to be. There's no need to show up any other way. I also think that I meet so many people and I'm like, we'd be on my podcast. I don't have a story to tell. I haven't done anything cool. I can find a reason for every single woman in this world to be on this podcast because we all know that you've been through one thing hard, and someone else in this world is going to go through it, or is going through it, and or will go through it. And if you're willing to share how you were able to get through it and move on, and be a better person behind it? That is what I want. It is just so funny to hear people go, I don't have any. I'm like, yes. I've had some very extreme guests on my podcast, for sure. Really crazy situations. I would just say that everyday, people who've gone through just your everyday life, fertility, changing jobs, getting fired, divorce, raising children, whatever it might be like, this is all part of life. We need to talk about it more.

Emily Sereno: I agree with you. I think that there's sometimes shame associated with pivots or transitions. I don't know if you see that in the conversations that you have with people where maybe they go into it and they're just like, oh, my gosh, I'm talking negatively to myself, or I'm not good enough. Or they've got all of these negative things that they're saying, and then you recognize the hardship that you went through actually makes you stronger and more resilient, and makes it easier. And you talk about it for the person going through it right now to get through it too because to what you had said earlier about, life is lonely and everything. You want to feel connected to people. If you share your story or pull the curtain back on, something that's difficult is going to make it easier for somebody else. I will do anything I can to make it easier so that nobody has to go through the things that I went through. I talk a lot about the silly little things that I had to do that were like, I'm going to wear a hat today because I'm not going to take a shower, but I still have to show up for this call. How can I make sure that I'm prepared for it? Or how do I preserve my energy on these calls? Just things that seem silly and small, but somebody needs to hear that. And I think this podcast is such a beautiful platform for people to see themselves in your guests too.

Heather Nelson: Totally. Unfortunately, I have not struggled with fertility. I have had a miscarriage so I can relate to that. I sometimes forget that. I went through that as well. I think I talked about it on one of the podcasts, and it was in between my surrogacy and my son who's now three. But I do know a lot of people in my life who have been struggling with fertility. I can name five off the top of my head who are going through it. Now, I do want to just say that there is an end to it. It might not happen right away, but I've seen some beautiful stories out of a really hard journey. I just want you to know that. Just take it day by day, your time will come when it does. It will come. However that shows up, whether it's your own, or surrogacy, or adopting, or whatever the case may be, it will happen the way God intended it to happen.

Emily Sereno: Thank you. I appreciate that. If you were to say that to me like six months ago, I would be like, no way. Again, I think that's just healing. I am so grateful that I can recognize that you need to work on your mindset. You need to tell yourself that you're going to get through this more. You're going to have to remind yourself that on the days where you feel like you can't do anything, and then you beat yourself up because you are this ambitious, driven, motivated, execution focused human because what you're going through right now isn't a representation of who you believe to be true, it doesn't make that version of you disappear altogether, and you'll eventually find your way back to it. I had to spend a lot of time to kind of get to the point where I can agree with you right now to be like, no, this is a circumstance, and you will work through it. It's going to be hard. But what is happening is happening to you, but it doesn't define who you are. It doesn't change who you are. It doesn't make you any less credible in your business because you want to talk about it. It doesn't make you lazy because you have to kind of go down to the status quo in your business for a little while you focus on helping yourself. And I think that if somebody's in the throes of the darkness right now, and maybe they hear that and they're like, oh, it's never going to get better. It will. I promise you, it will. It's just going to take time and time again of you telling yourself, I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna be okay. I can get through this. I joked, I painted my fingernails, and I knew I was gonna be okay. That was the self care moment for me of like, okay, I painted my fingernails. I'm gonna be okay. I just kept having to repeat that. I'm not really one to be the manifestation type of girl, but I understand why, how it works now. It has been a game changer for me to get to the point where I can still sit in sadness at certain points, but I can also appreciate the sunshine, the positivity and the winds a little bit more than I could beforehand.

Heather Nelson: Hearing these stories as somebody who might not be in it or dealing with it, I just had this thought about being self aware of how you show up in your day to day. And I'm gonna say this because I kind of get emotional about it, because I have three kids. I have a three year old who I started over. My son was eight when he was born. It totally rocked my world. We knew we wanted to have him. But because I was in this total career space, it was really hard for me to start over. And I find myself some days just annoyed. He won't go to sleep, or he's screaming at me and he's being difficult, but then it's this aha moment that I need to appreciate this gift. Because not everyone gets to. It's just a reminder that some of the things that we might not be going through, some things that we have, or things like the positive things in our lives that we need to be a little bit more, have a little more gratitude toward them. Because he wouldn't go to sleep last night and I was like, I just want you to go to sleep. Why did I have another child? I love him to death, but you go in these moments of like, what did I do? Or this is so hard right now, but there's people out there that are dealing with it harder.

Emily Sereno: I think it's hard. I wouldn't say that your heart is any different than my heart. It's just hard, right? But I thought you were going to take that in a completely different direction when you started out. Because I was like, oh, what are the things that I'm much more aware of people asking me questions about that I have gone through this. A random stranger at a conference asked me if I had kids, and I said no. And then they said, are you gonna have kids? Cap kids before you get too old. And I'm like, are you kidding me? You don't know who I am. How do you answer that question?Do you have kids? And I'm like, I don't. I still struggle with those questions. It's interesting how things can hit a little differently once you're on the other side and you can see some of those things. Some of the things I'd love to just share for somebody  who's going through something difficult. 

The hardest thing for me was when people would ask me, how are you doing? And I hated that question because I'm not doing well. I'm angry one day, I'm sad the next second. It made me feel guilty that I didn't have a better answer. I am really trying to make people happy over here. It just was like, well, I don't have a good answer for you. I'm probably not going to have a good answer for you. And so if there's someone who is struggling with something, rephrase that question. Ask a different way. Or, hey, did you get outside today? Because sunshine can help you with your energy. Did you get outside? Did you go for a walk? Can I swing by and drop something off for you. Or phrase it in a way that is still going to get a response from them. I think the hardest point, and I got to a point where I stopped asking myself. I don't want that question. I don't want you to ask me about it because it makes me emotional. Then add a layer of guilt and then frustration because I'm not getting better yet, and it's going to take time. I just would downward spiral, honestly. If there's ways to just tweak that question, I think that might land a lot easier for somebody. I know the point is, you just want to tell me, hey, you're thinking. But the way that that lands with me is harder than the intention behind it.

Heather Nelson: I think that goes to anybody who's going through anything hard like that is such a great reminder of how we need to show up in their lives. I just think you're a doll. I love your story. I love what you're doing for us. I can never say entrepreneur. It is one of those words that I could never have in my business.

Emily Sereno: It's funny you say that because I stumble over it sometimes, and I actually have been thinking about it. I might still do this, but every time I say it on my podcast, I record it in Riverside so it transcribes everything, and it's like a service printer, service piner. I'm like, I'm just gonna do a post where it's just all the misspelled ways that this word comes out, because it is a little bit of a tongue twister. I do have to admit, I even get it wrong. So no worries.

Heather Nelson: I'm like, do I have to say this word? Yes, I do. But I love what you're doing for us because it is a very lonely world, and I definitely want to learn more about what you're doing on the network, because I think it could benefit my life so much. But I'm so glad we connected. This is not goodbye. I feel like every time I get it on, I'm like, they're my new best friend. Whenever I come to New York, I would love to see you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for sharing your story. I know sometimes that it's hard to relive those feelings again. But again, if you can change one person's mindset or mood for the day, it makes it all worth it.

Emily Sereno: Oh, Heather, thank you so much for having me. This is such a fun conversation. I can't believe how fast the time went. It was so great chatting with you.